a t l a n t a

atlanta, GA.

in 1836 the decision was made to build the western and atlantic railroad to provide a link between savannah and the midwest. ultimately, the railway ended in atlanta at a place that came to be known as “terminus” – end of the l i n e.

maybe it’s fitting,

it’s been a long journey to get here: four years of thinking about it, one year of planning, and three days of launch. we are officially on our way to chile today which will involves:

• getting up at 2 am
• being at the airport by 3am
• fly to boston (2.5 hr flight / 6.5 hr layover)
• fly to houston (4.5 hour flight / 2.5 hour layover)
• fly to santiago (9.5 hour flight)
• 6 hours of waiting to catch a bus to calama, which will then be a 20 hour bus ride

we left at the end of the line.

(and i’m not ready).

overwhelmed. anxious. afraid. feeling six feet underground and i can’t breathe from down here and i can’t see the way out,  i feel far from God – and i don’t know who that girl was standing at an airport in the phillipines feeling so sure and saying send me,

because i don’t want to go.

and it’s hard to say that out loud, it’s hard to say that to all of you who support me and believe in this work – thank you for the love & kindness you have shown me, it is not something i take lightly, nor is this call from God, but i made a commitment to be transparent in this process and so this is where i’m at right now –

(but i’m not staying here).

i don’t want to go,

but i’m g o i n g  .

because when you’re at the end of the line

the only way to go is forward.

this is not goodbye

just until we meet again.

see you in calama, chile.

because this isn’t the end of my line.

it’s just beginning.

bilbo: can you promise me that i will come back? / gandalf: no. and if you do, you will not be the same.

-j.r.r. tolkein